Running your home like the powerhouse operation it needs to be takes more than shared calendars and crossed fingers — it takes intentional, consistent communication. That’s what we’re tackling in this Toolkit Series episode of The New Modern Mom Podcast.
In this episode, Barbara Mighdoll dives deep into one of the most game-changing tools in any working mom’s arsenal: the weekly partner meeting. It’s not just about coordinating calendars or divvying up chores — it’s about transforming your relationship from survival mode into a supportive, intentional partnership that can handle the chaos of career and parenting. Drawing from her own experience and powerful insights from two previous guests, Hitha Palepu and Jeanelle Teves, this episode delivers a proven framework for making your home life feel less reactive and more aligned.
Whether you’ve tried weekly check-ins and abandoned them, or you’re just now realizing the shared Google Calendar isn’t cutting it, this episode is packed with concrete steps to help you communicate better, plan smarter, and create a more peaceful rhythm at home. Bonus: You’ll walk away with a full meeting agenda ready to plug-and-play.
🧩 The real reason communication with your partner breaks down — and how weekly meetings solve it
When communication breaks down in a partnership, the result is often resentment, confusion, and burnout. But this episode shows how carving out intentional time each week can prevent those emotional flare-ups and create space for clarity and calm.
“In a marriage with young kids and managing a household, you can tend to take each other for granted and assume everything is okay until it's not, and then there is a big sort of emotional moment that forces you to take a step back… be proactive — any brewing issues or concerns or big feelings can be addressed sort of head-on before it balloons out and is managed in a calm, caring, but also more effective manner.” – Hitha Palepu
🗂 A 5-point meeting agenda that’s been tested in busy households
Barbara shares the exact structure she and her husband use for their weekly meetings — a five-point framework that helps them review, prioritize, and plan without spiraling into overwhelm. This tried-and-true format keeps meetings efficient and grounded in action.
“Here is my five-point agenda for my own weekly meeting with my husband. Number one, we ask, did you accomplish what you intended to last week? Why or why not? Number two, we share our top three intentions of the week… Number three, we go over all special plans, events, or childcare needs for the next seven days… Number four, we discuss our weekly meal plan… Number five, we review any of those recurring topics or themes from that homework assignment I mentioned.” -Barbara Mighdoll
💬 Why emotional check-ins matter just as much as logistics
Beyond coordinating schedules, Barbara and her guests emphasize the emotional side of these weekly check-ins. Taking the time to ask how your partner is really doing builds trust and fosters a more connected relationship.
“We have this sort of emotional check-in that we do every single week… in order to have a well-run household, you could take a lot of pages from the business playbook… but also there has to be the emotional piece. So having that ‘How can I be a better partner to you?’ kind of check-in once a week can also be uncomfortable when you first start, but it offers a safe space… it also helps us enjoy our date nights a lot more because it’s more fun, easygoing conversations versus trying to work out a thorny emotional issue.” -Jeanelle Teves
🛠 How to identify the tasks that fall through the cracks and finally solve for them
We all have those “oh crap” moments — missed birthday gifts, forgotten water bottles, solo parenting surprises. Barbara gives listeners a simple exercise to uncover those patterns and use them to shape the meeting agenda.
“Write down a list of things that often fall through the cracks in your day-to-day or weekly schedule… Find the common themes, and these are the topics that will begin to form the agenda for your weekly meeting… They also may be things that accumulate in mental load, those things that end up distracting you from your most productive self.” -Barbara Mighdoll
📅 How to think bigger than just the week ahead with quarterly and annual planning rituals
For long-term alignment, Barbara introduces planning rituals that look beyond the weekly grind. From goal-setting walks to quarterly deep dives, these moments of reflection help couples prioritize what matters most.
“We started doing this when our daughter was one, and it is actually one of the things that we start talking about even weeks before New Year’s Day… we’ll go get a coffee and sit on a bench in Central Park and take turns reading to each other the goals that we've written down for ourselves personally and for our family… quarterly, we do these deeper check-ins… what are the projects for our home? What are the types of vacations we want to go on?”- Jeanelle Teves
Listen to the Episode
Want bonus tools and takeaways?
For exclusive bonus tools and takeaways, subscribe to the newsletter: newmodernmom.com/subscribe
Connect with Hitha on Instagram here or LinkedIn here
Connect with Jeanelle on Instagram here or LinkedIn here
Rather read the full interview than listen?
[00:00:00] Hi everyone. Welcome to the toolkit series from the new Modern Mom podcast. I'm thrilled to bring you this bonus series in between seasons. Each episode will be a quick, actionable deep dive into some of the most important themes from season one. Plus we'll explore a few niche conversations that didn't quite make the final cut, but are just too good not to share. [00:00:20] My goal is to help you build the tools you need so they're ready and waiting in your toolkit, the ones you're going to reach for to calm the chaos of career and motherhood. Today I wanna focus on a key repeat theme that showed up across so many of my guests, and that was communication with your partner. [00:00:37]This is such an important topic because truly I feel like this was the unlock moment for me after becoming a mom. Is understanding that parenting is a team sport and you need to work together as a team in order for your life and your partner's life to feel smoother and more present. So I [00:01:00] wanna share a little bit about how this has played out in my own life. [00:01:02] My husband and I have weekly meetings, ideally on Sundays during nap time or while we're driving somewhere in the car, maybe while they're playing at the park or. After they go to bed, and we have a very consistent agenda for these meetings. We talk about the childcare schedule for the week. We talk about what social events after work we need to plan for and mentally prepare for solo parenting nights. [00:01:27] We talk about what meals we wanna eat for the week. We go over our Costco order that we place every Monday, and we also look at the next weekend ahead to make sure we are prepping for anything needed, like buying a birthday present or booking a babysitter for a Saturday night date. Thinking about how this has shown up in some of our guests lives, I wanted to share two point of views that were very notable to me. [00:01:49] First up is hit the pal Pew, who is an author, CEO speaker, mom of two. She gives a very honest and authentic look at how she runs these weekly [00:02:00] meetings with her husband. You had previously mentioned on your Instagram that you do weekly meetings on the weekends, and I would love to know how you started these and how do you structure these? [00:02:11] What do you discuss? It is a pretty detailed half, very tactical, like a business meeting and half like a therapy session. And that's intentional because I think. We used to not have either, and it was chaos. And what are these expenses, or what do you mean you didn't tell me about these plans, et cetera. So even though we do have a joint family calendar that we're constantly putting, when one of us is traveling, blocking that out, one of us has an evening event, blocking that out, having that weekly check-in to review the calendar, to review expenses. [00:02:45] Talk about upcoming travel plans, a new activity, school forms, et cetera. Just a quick check-in about that always helps. So it's business like, it's like a weekly standup if you're at a startup. And then we have this sort of emotional check-in that we [00:03:00] do every single week. And that's really because I think. [00:03:05] In a marriage with young kids and managing a household, you can tend to take each other for granted and assume everything is okay until it's not, and there is a big sort of emotional moment that forces you to take a step back and really recalibrate and making it be proactive Any. Brewing issues or concerns or big feelings can be addressed sort of head on before it balloons out and managed in a calm, caring, but also more effective manner. [00:03:38] So having that, how can I be a better partner to you? Kind of check in once a week, can also be uncomfortable when you first start, but it offers a safe space that if something is lingering or on your mind. If there isn't a few days, you're gonna discuss it versus waiting for a specific moment where you can discuss it. [00:03:57] And I think that also helps us enjoy our date [00:04:00] nights a lot more 'cause it's more fun, easygoing conversations versus trying to work out a thorny emotional issue. The thing that really stands out to me about HIPAA's approach to having these weekly meetings with her husband is that she outlines how they're both very tactical, you know, talking about expenses, talking about the calendar, but also how critical and important it is to have this consistent emotional connection and. [00:04:31] Time on your schedule to just focus on emotionally how each of you are doing. We are in such a busy season of life, and I think it's so easy for the two of us, me and my husband, to kind of take on this approach of like, we're managing the household, we're running through the day to day, and to really pull ourselves out and remind ourselves like we chose each other first and having that. [00:04:59] [00:05:00] Time in the week that is dedicated for those discussions to talk about how we're feeling and emotionally doing. It's just so important and something we shouldn't forget about. Janelle TVIs, on the other hand, had a great idea where she does 15 minute weekly check-ins on Sundays, and it's kind of just like a scan of the week talking about traveling, logistics, what the kids have to do, but she also talked about. [00:05:29] Having these kind of annual meetings as well. I love that, and that's actually something I'm planning on implementing in terms of having these bigger meetings where we think about, okay, what's our why for the year? Why are we saying no to things? Why are we saying yes to things? What are our goals as a family? [00:05:47] Having those bigger picture items that we all are aligned behind, I think make those weekly meetings hopefully easier when it comes to prioritizing our time. Effectively, let's listen in. Can you [00:06:00] talk to me about how you apply the concept of quarterly planning to your personal life? Yeah. It's really a tool that I borrowed from business and that I applied into my household because I realized that I. [00:06:12] In order to have a well run household, you could take a lot of pages from the business playbook. So setting annual goals, doing quarterly deep dives, and then having weekly progress checkings. A lot of business managers, entrepreneurs, leaders, will have that kind of rhythm and business and. My husband and I didn't always have this. [00:06:35] It wasn't until we had children and we started wanting to do things like buy a home and take certain vacations or have a certain type of lifestyle, and that was really like the practicality side of it. So we. Having New Year's day walk, it's one of my favorite rituals that he and I do. And we'll go get a coffee and we'll go to a, a bench in Central Park and our kids will [00:07:00] play and we'll take turns reading to each other the goals that we've written down for ourselves personally and for our family. [00:07:07] And we started doing this when our daughter was one, and it is actually one of the things that we start talking about. Even weeks before, year's day, because we're just really excited to talk to each other about what we want for ourselves and for our family. And so we set our annual goals and then quarterly. [00:07:25] We do these deeper check-ins. It's, it's definitely not perfect. We're not militant about it, but it's just like, how are we doing? Taking a look at your accounts and your finances and taking a look ahead at the calendar, okay, what are the types of vacations we wanna go on? What kind of birthday party do we wanna plan for our children this year? [00:07:44] What are the projects for our homes that we can do? And so that has been part of the quarterly. Tracking. And then on a weekly basis, I talk about this often we do just a 15 minute check-in on Sundays, and it's just like a scan of the week. Okay, where [00:08:00] are you? Are you traveling? Here's what the kids have. [00:08:03] And it helps us do one of two things. One, it helps us give each other visibility into what each other has on their plate, and that brings in a level of empathy for each other. He really understands. He might not be. In the pitch with me, he might not be in the meeting with me, but he understands, okay, you have a huge meeting on Thursday. [00:08:24] I got it like Wednesday night. Don't worry. Like I, I will take the kids and I'll handle it, and he gives me that little extra space opposed to me getting to Wednesday, feeling stressed out, maybe being a little bit more snippy, and then this kind of like unnecessary combustion happening, which is, that has happened, but it has prevented this from happening more often. [00:08:45] That's the first thing. Then the second thing is it allows us to ask for help from each other. So if his cup is empty, or me, if I'm feeling really tired, we can use that moment to just say, Hey, I need to lean on you a little bit more. I'm feeling really burnt out and I wanna [00:09:00] just preface, this is something that has been helpful, but every partnership. [00:09:06] Every family dynamic we're, it just ebbs and flows, and this is very much with the stage of our children and where we both are as individuals is helps us co-parent. So what is a tangible tool or tip that you can put safely away in your toolkit on this topic? I want you to start having those weekly meetings, and I'm going to share the exact agenda we follow so you have an easy place to start. [00:09:30] Just like any good valuable business, meaning yours with your partner, should have clear goals and a consistent agenda. There should be someone making sure the conversation stays on track and each person should walk away with clear roles and responsibilities for those action items that you all discuss. [00:09:47] First, I have one homework assignment that both you and your partner need to sit down and do independently of each other, and that is. Write down a list of things that often fall through the cracks in your day-to-day or weekly schedule. [00:10:00] You know those, oh shit moments like you forgot to book a babysitter, or you forgot to pack a water bottle in your child's backpack for school, which I do all the time. [00:10:09] Or think of those things that always seem to cause bickering between you and your husband. They also may be things that accumulate in mental load, those things that end up distracting you from your most productive self. Examples for me are small things like what's for dinner or bigger things like I need to book a hotel for an upcoming trip. [00:10:30] Once you do that, take that list and aggregate all of those things. Find the common themes, and these are the topics that will begin to form the agenda for your weekly meeting. Here is my five point agenda for my own weekly meeting with my husband. Number one, we ask, did you accomplish what you intended to last week? [00:10:55] Why or why not? Number two, we share our top three intentions [00:11:00] of the week. These are the three biggest things that if nothing else on our to-do list gets done, we will still feel accomplished and good about how we spent our time for the week. Number three. We go over all special plans, events, or childcare needs for the next seven days. [00:11:15] And then we identify who needs to plan for what. So for example, do we need to change our nannie's hours on a certain day? Do we need to make a restaurant reservation for a date night or we share a car? So do we both need the car during the same day at the exact same time? How are we going to handle this? [00:11:33] Number four, we discuss our weekly meal plan In a very important step, we write it down. I make note of the meal name, where to find the recipe, who's cooking, and any special groceries that need to be ordered, I immediately add to my Costco or Amazon cart. A quick note on this agenda item. In my household, both my husband and I share the [00:12:00] responsibility of cooking, so this is a very important agenda item for us that we actively discuss. [00:12:06] However, in your household, if only one of you is taking on the responsibility and there is no strong opinions to warrant a discussion on it from the other person, then I would just remove this as an item from your agenda because it's not necessary. Number five. We review any of those recurring topics or themes from that homework assignment I mentioned. [00:12:28] So that may be discussing progress towards a family vacation plan, or discussing how planning is coming for our child's upcoming birthday party. Or it may be looking at our monthly budget and where we're spending money, is it in the categories that we outlined? It also could be just discussing like how to optimize existing routines. [00:12:50] Look at your morning routine. Are there things that are really causing frustrations? Is there areas that one person could be leaning more into? I'm a constant optimizer. I'm always looking at ways to like tweak [00:13:00] and change things that make it easier for our day-to-day lives. And that is our agenda. [00:13:06] Seriously, if you didn't take notes just now, just rewind and jot down those five items. Go ahead and schedule 45 minutes on your calendar for this upcoming Sunday and just get started. It doesn't have to be perfect. You just need to be consistent. Alright. Thanks for tuning into this toolkit series on the new Modern Mom podcast. [00:13:28] I hope today's tips help you simplify the chaos of career in motherhood one tool at a time. If you found this episode helpful, don't forget to subscribe. Give us a five star rating and leave a review. You can always connect with me on LinkedIn, follow new modern mom on Instagram and sign up for my newsletter. [00:13:45] I mean it when I say I would love to hear from you. My dms are always open. Let me know, did you implement this tool? How's it going? What's on your agenda? I wanna hear from you. [00:14:00]Author
